Botch, Shuses and Stakings

While one's hair is his crowning glory (which I unfortunately lost after a few months of being a call boy) , his footwear are his stepping goodies. Being a person who is so highly critical, who studies people from head to toe, I really can't help but notice them from their hairstyle (or hair loss in my case) and hair color, to their beautiful or oogly faces, to the cohesive clothes to the floral blouse and printed pants (the so-called astronauts), and yes, one of the my gazillion pet peeves - their footwear.

Just a disclaimer, I'm not a fashionista. I have my own share of "what am I wearing" moments but I'm more of a safe casual person than a fashion-forward fashionably daring one. In the first place, I don't want to be noticed only because of my physical attributes but because they know me as a person.

These are the things that irritate me and when I say I'm irritated, I want to approach that person, take off what he's wearing, throw it, ruin it, have one truck run over it, or burn it. Worse, I want to stab that person to death so that he would bleed and liters of blood will flow down to what he's wearing. Morbid huh?! That's the reason I changed my blogsite. I don't want to be criminally liable though I know now that plain planning of an act does not constitute an overt act, thus, no crime has been committed yet. But I'd better be on the safe side.

• Boots - I call them botch for some reason that I don't know. My best girl friend endured months of being ruthlessly criticized because of her oogly botch. I even told her that I wanted to throw them away or put them on fire. I could not stand the unappealing chunky heels and the unflattering tip of the footwear. I believe that one can have good pair of boots by simply choosing the right style and it's even difficult to find one in shoe stores, how much more in ukay-ukays? Furthermore, I really think that there are only a few people who could pull off wearing boots - and those are the ones with long, slender legs, not like Charisse who's chunky and short, cutting her short legs shorter. And my God, Philippines is too hot to have boots worn everyday. Unless you're a celebrity or again, you really look good with boots. Other than that, better wear ...

• Havaianas - The first time I saw this brand made me think, "Okay, they're just like the usual 50-peso Spartan rubber sandals I'm wearing at home minus the very expensive name and the high price." I feel it's impractical to wear this brand because it just looks ordinary. Only a few people in the province appreciates this because people are more into aesthetics and not into brands. It's not even that soft. The only advantage that I know is that it lasts because my friend told me that her dog tried biting her pair of Havaianas but there weren't any bite marks traced on her footwear. I'm not that rich and curious to to try that with my dogs. And Bleach is not a bad dog to be biting anything he sees.

• Crocs - My initial impression on this brand was - bulldozer. I would only wear it when I'll go swimming in a beach full of corals so that I won't have another [very] close encounter with another sea urchin and be hospitalized and undergo surgery because of its deadly and transparent spines. Some friends tell me that it's so comfortable to one's feet but my slippers are comfortable so why should I try another one?

• Brown Shoes - Brown is the color I least like. I find it being worn by old people. I only had a pair of brown shoes to pair up with my khaki pants because khaki and anything with tint of brown is better worn with brown shoes (and belt). A lot of men I see wear brown shoeses [sic] with black pants which hurts my eyes. I want to bring that leather dye (lang king) and wipe it to those brown shoes. Ha ha ha! So bad! I see one in the class who does that. Ha ha ha! Another sign of bitterness. I've observed that fashion crime since first week of class but I still didn't dare to tell him. Who am I to do that? I'm not a legitimate stylist.

• Stockings - Although they are helpful to prevent varicose veins, they shouldn't be worn with open-toe sandals. Isn't the purpose of wearing open toes to show the toes and the newly-pedicured toenails? One more thing. Could girls have the decency to clean their feet when they wear sandals? I really think that hygiene starts with one's feet. If a girl takes care of her feet well, how much more does she take good care of the other parts of her body? (wink)

These and more than these are a few of the things I hate to see. I know I still have a lot of things observed but my memory degradation is preventing me from recalling them. I might write a part 2 of this once I remember them. You might have some things to add. I would surely appreciate it.