My Head Needs Some Bonking

After buying a gift for Guy and Hanna's wedding, Junnah, Ian and I had our dinner. As always, I'm the subject of their jokes, with some rebounds against Junnah. Some funny exchanges of wits turned to something serious - about my attitude problem. Both people reprimanded me for being impulsive with my decisions, for being a rolling stone, and for not finishing what I started. I know it's my fault but I always have the argument that I can't continue with something that I'm not happy at.

If this would be my eternal defense, "forever" would just remain as a word to me. That also means that I can't hold on to a relationship the moment I can't get happy with it. But why have I stuck with the same friends for more than a decade? Why have I been enjoying with TM for three years now? Why have I maintained this blogsite for already five years?

Honestly, I'm in the middle of a limbo, AGAIN. I really want to know my place in this earth before I'll get consumed by this so-called quarter life crisis. Committing suicide is not an option. I still want to grow old with the woman I truly love.

But first, I need to grow up. NOW. And I need some bonking.

Always Ready

I have realized this evening that I'm almost always ready when a friend invites me to his very, not so very, and so not very special event. I must say that more than 50% of the invitations are accepted, not because I don't have anything much important to do (I must accept that there are still some instances where I'm totally free) but because I find time to free myself just for me to grace that invitation.

The question is, that does really mean that I'm a friend who's always on the go, who values a friend and not hurt him for being turned down, or am I just some boring individual who doesn't have any other things to do in life than to please his friends?

Happy Christmas

I was supposed to rant about what happened almost a week ago. Thank goodness for a very great internet connection here that God didn't permit me to post it. This is the season of happiness and negative things should have no space for my blogsite... yet.

So far, tonight's been nice. All in this house, including their moods, cooperated with my usual demands to wear their red attires, including my body itch that's been disturbing me. It's more than allergy.

It's my first time to prepare macaroni salad and I don't even know if it tastes right. I'm doing it for my Mom who so much adores the taste of that angled pasta drenched in that oh-so-yummy mayonnaise that I appreciate more than Kris Aquino. I couldn't control myself looking at the nanny mixing the pasta with just the mayo and some few amount of spices. Thank goodness to Google and its links that I was able to find a nice recipe and I headed to our sarisari store to gather some other ingredients such as carrots, eggs, chicken, cheese and pickles. They, including my niece and nephews, say it tastes okay. I appreciate their honesty and understatement. Ha ha!

Everybody received his gift except me. That's always the case. Since Ate Doreen left the house, I've gone to bed empty-handed but it's okay. As the season tells us, it's better to give than to receive. I understand my Mom hates to shop and she knows I can't appreciate her poor taste especially when it comes to fashion so she opted not to make an attempt. But at least, she could have handed me some cash. Ha ha ha!

I feel that our decoration looks boring. I think it's because it's been like this for five years and I feel I could put all the decorations blind-folded. The only consolation I have is to receive the commendations from our ultraconservative neighbors who assert that it's still better to get married than to be a single parent like Ate Doreen. The hell I care.

I'm still so much awake til now and I don't know how to get to sleep. I can't drink milk because I might wake up and stay at the restroom for a day. My digestive system is so much perky when I overeat.

Enjoying

The Christmas party held last Saturday was a blast! I didn't expect it to be that fun. People congratulate me for being able to put up an event like that and honestly, I don't deserve all the credit. It wouldn't have been that fun had those people chose not to come, not to participate and not to enjoy. I am just conceptualizer. The end product relied on the people.

Thinking, organizing and working on a project such as that is really tiring. But definitely, it is very much fulfilling. I enjoy doing it and I didn't have any complaints as long as people will do what I want them to do. Thank goodness there weren't any killjoys. Inviting some people even took a lot of pressure. I got to the point of threatening them that I won't talk to them for a year. "Excuse me, do I know you?" Ha ha ha! For some, I told them to stand by their promise that they will attend. As for some, I told them that it is a must. And I was successful enough. Though there were some people who tried to sabotage it, and they thought they were successful in convincing the others to boycott the event, pictures show that our party is very awesome.

I think I really enjoy doing it because it's been my frustration to come up with an event where all people cooperate, go with the theme, participate in the activities and really have fun without getting drunk and losing one's self. I am looking forward to organizing an event where people pole-vault when it comes to costumes, production, presentation, and even venue. That will ultimately happen. Impossible is nothing!

Here's is the video that I made:

Exhausted

I only had two hours of sleep. I attended the TM meeting this morning where Lynne was our general evaluator. I was nervous about her reaction when she saw me and I was surprised that when she got inside the venue, she greeted me like nothing happened. It made me feel happy because finally, before this year ends, I've made peace with one person.

Along the conversation, I've realized why Lynne and I get together well. She's a Capricorn. He he he. Oh well. But there's not a single romantic feeling I feel for her huh. It's still Cris. He he he.

Sweet December

It is already December! Aside from my much-awaited Christmas and New Year's Days, I also have a lot to look forward to for this month.

• December 9 - Ate Doreen's birthday. She'll be 35 but I won't tease her this time because though she's still single, she already has a baby.
  
  
• December 11 - Our Toastmasters area Christmas party. It was initially planned to be our home club's Christmas party then we decided to make it a joint party with our sister club. When I was invited to become the general evaluator of another club in our area, Zaldy, the party host, suggested to include them. Finally, after all the no-we're-going-to-hold-our-own-party and this-is-getting-confusing-because-some-officers-don't-like-the idea, the club presidents and the area governor finally agreed to make it an area party. Thank God I won't be the emcee but we are going to perform a Broadway medley. Since this is a party, I am tasked, again, to create an audio-visual presentation. Here I go sleepless days again!
  
  
• December 19 - Company Christmas party. Theme: Glam Rock. I think people have run out of party theme ideas that this would be the third party where rock is the theme. Hay.
  
  
• December 20 - Enriqueta's birthday. She'll be 61 this year and still getting more bitchy. Ha ha ha! I love you Ma!
  
  
• December 21 - Dylan's 3rd birthday. He's still three years old but he looks like he's 8. Ha ha ha!
  
  
• December 22 - Lilet's birthday. She's my kids' nanny and we're so thankful to have her. Amazing dedication to her job.
  
  
• December 25 - Christmas! Hay. I haven't shopped for my presents for them yet. Will I be able to do it? I'm really financially challenged.
  
  
• December 28 - Guy's wedding. I'll be the emcee. Again, the theme is rock but we can't wear black (except my jacket). Pressure for me. I have a feeling Guy gave me a role so that I won't have much time criticizing other people in the occasion.
  
  
• December 29 - Cha and Tim's wedding. I haven't received the invitation yet but Cha promised to include me in the guest list. I'm not yet sure but I'm quite positive about it. Hopefully, this wedding will be realized. They've been together since 1998. Nobody can beat that.
  
  
• December 30 - Rizal Day. How can I forget our national hero? Ha ha ha ha!
  
  
• December 31 - Preparation for Media Noche.

Now who says I'm not busy? Ha ha ha! I already had the ticket as early as February thinking that I would still be at school. What about my job? Who cares? Ha ha ha! I already have my plan on how to get away from being memo-ed. Plus I am applying for another job and hopefully I'll start working by January. So help me God.