After buying a gift for Guy and Hanna's wedding, Junnah, Ian and I had our dinner. As always, I'm the subject of their jokes, with some rebounds against Junnah. Some funny exchanges of wits turned to something serious - about my attitude problem. Both people reprimanded me for being impulsive with my decisions, for being a rolling stone, and for not finishing what I started. I know it's my fault but I always have the argument that I can't continue with something that I'm not happy at.
If this would be my eternal defense, "forever" would just remain as a word to me. That also means that I can't hold on to a relationship the moment I can't get happy with it. But why have I stuck with the same friends for more than a decade? Why have I been enjoying with TM for three years now? Why have I maintained this blogsite for already five years?
Honestly, I'm in the middle of a limbo, AGAIN. I really want to know my place in this earth before I'll get consumed by this so-called quarter life crisis. Committing suicide is not an option. I still want to grow old with the woman I truly love.
But first, I need to grow up. NOW. And I need some bonking.
If this would be my eternal defense, "forever" would just remain as a word to me. That also means that I can't hold on to a relationship the moment I can't get happy with it. But why have I stuck with the same friends for more than a decade? Why have I been enjoying with TM for three years now? Why have I maintained this blogsite for already five years?
Honestly, I'm in the middle of a limbo, AGAIN. I really want to know my place in this earth before I'll get consumed by this so-called quarter life crisis. Committing suicide is not an option. I still want to grow old with the woman I truly love.
But first, I need to grow up. NOW. And I need some bonking.
Hahaha!It's because you are too hard on yourself. You tend to expect much from yourself,maybe unconsciously but at times when things seems to be going tough you wanna give up especially if you can't see the benefits ahead. Yes, you are impulsive and you want only the things that make you happy. in terms of relationships you are somewhat loyal...you can be annoyingly persistent and insistent, but still you've always been there and ready to help. You just need to find what it is you really want. Surely while making your speeches for your TM there are some realizations that you come up with along the way.LOL!Good luck!
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